UN-ORTHODOX JEW

NEW ADDRESS-UNORTHODOXJEWS.BLOGSPOT.COM ADD"S" TO JEW

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

The New Blogger Rebbe

With great sadness I announce that the freidicker(previous) Blogger Rebbe is no more.

Therefore with much humility and self-praise,I hereby announce that I AM THE NEW BLOGGER REBBE!

The previous Blogger Rebbe's blog is not cold yet,and his keyboard is not even put away,but I am in a rush to annoint myself the Blogger Rebbe.The world of blogs can not exist without a rebbe.

The previous Rebbe did not leave a tzavoah,so I hereby declare the following:
1-I made up my own tzavoah and put myself in it.

2-I made my own Hachtorah(crowning) party and invited a bunch of weirdos to sway,sing & dance.

3-Everyone at the tisch had to eat from my germs with their hands and trample on at least five people,if not ,they risk confiscation of their chandeliers.

4-All my Chassidim must take a polygraph test-If they did NOT commit a crime,they must leave my group at once.

5-All my followers must besmirch every other blogger,and claim that I am the greatest blogger that ever lived and will ever live.

YECHEI BLOGGER REBBE,MOREINU V'RABBEINU LEOLAM VAED!!!!!!!

15 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

You are real funny,I am definitely becoming a Blogover hasid.

Wednesday, May 25, 2005 2:49:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As the Chelmer Gaon, I am misnagid Blogover chassidus -- but seeing as how the Rebbe sets a not-too-bad tisch and cured me of impotence, I'll make an exception. How did he cure me? Better you shouldn't ask.

Wednesday, May 25, 2005 5:05:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ye,ye,ye! Ales SHTAIT in de Gemorrah!
Tisch,Pisch,Fish :der rebbe is tzchished.

Wednesday, May 25, 2005 8:54:00 AM  
Blogger Rebeljew said...

YECHEI BLOGGER REBBE,MOREINU V'RABBEINU LEOLAM VAED!!!!!!!

Not yet Melech HaMoshiach??

Wednesday, May 25, 2005 5:37:00 PM  
Blogger Un-Orthodox Jew said...

Working on it!
Any suggestions?

Wednesday, May 25, 2005 5:46:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Rebbe,
I have one.
Get a donkey,and start acting like one.

Wednesday, May 25, 2005 6:26:00 PM  
Anonymous daat y said...

very funny.
But I can't yet be a chassid .Should I try.

Thursday, May 26, 2005 10:02:00 AM  
Blogger Un-Orthodox Jew said...

Absolutely!Go commit a crime and call me in the morning.

Thursday, May 26, 2005 11:52:00 AM  
Anonymous daat y said...

are all crimes the same or do you have any recommendations?

Thursday, May 26, 2005 5:56:00 PM  
Blogger Un-Orthodox Jew said...

Go to the Babooner tisch tonight and take a knife & fork

Friday, May 27, 2005 10:35:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Rebbe,
Can You pasken on ksamim(underwear shailos for niddah)on your blog?
I figure I can gather up all the ksamim,scan them over to you?
Whaddya think?
Modern technology such a deal.
Just think of all the weirdo rabbis that will be put out of the ladies underwear business.

Sunday, May 29, 2005 8:49:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This sounds like a serious shaila.
Please refer these type of shailas to MT-a specialist in these issues.
He may have to meet with the owner of the kesem first,before he will render a psak.He takes these issues very seriously.

Tuesday, May 31, 2005 10:23:00 AM  
Anonymous daat y said...

how big an aveira is it not to blog in over a week.

Thursday, June 02, 2005 11:06:00 AM  
Blogger Un-Orthodox Jew said...

Very serious indeed!
I will bring a korban chatos by burning my bekishe with the herring stains.
Any suggestions on sizzling topics?

Thursday, June 02, 2005 1:40:00 PM  
Blogger Rishus said...

www.rishus.blogspot.com

NEW BLOG ON RISHUS AND EVIL CHECK IT OUT

Saturday, December 31, 2005 4:46:00 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home