An Open Letter To Rabbis Moshe Tendler And Dovid Feinstein
Rabbonim,
This is the open letter I published July 20, a mere five months ago, urging Mordecai to settle this issue with the RCA. Please read it very carefully. I will direct a new letter to you at the end of the July letter to Mordecai.
(I urge readers to go back to July 20, click on the comments, and see how wrong you were for blasting me. I'm talking particularly to a few "bigshot" bloggers who have as much brains as the amoeba and apes they came from).
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
An Open Letter To Mordecai Tendler
I have no idea whether you are guilty or innocent of the many charges against you.
I do assume innocence,although the latest developments with the RCA causes me to pause.
I do not have a horse in this race.
I do not have a kugel in this oven.
I do not have a black hat on this head.
So for starters you need to know I hope you are innocent.
I did not say I hope you are" found "innocent,because the only thing you can be" found" is guilty.
You know what the score is. Either you are guilty or innocent,there is no gray area.
I do know what this fight with the RCA represents, and that makes me a nogaih b'dovor, because whatever the outcome of this matter, all streams of Orthodox Jewry will be affected.
Trying to avoid the well known cliche, I have come up with my own.
WHERE THERE IS CHOLENT,THERE IS HEARTBURN!
The above is a general rule that I learned throughout my own trials and tribulations that life offers. I sense that there is something here that does not quite meet the proverbial eye.
You have waited way too long to come out swinging. These rumors have been swirling around for years.
Why pick a fight with an adversary that you can not beat? You can NOT beat them!
They will destroy whatever is left of your reputation.
I am not saying you should not be defending yourself, but this Israeli bais din gimmick sounds and feels like camouflage and subterfuge.
I know Rabbi Shmuel Fried extremely well. He is the toain or attorney for the RCA.
A few things you must know about this guy.
HE IS THE SMARTEST AND SHREWDEST TOAIN ALIVE TODAY.
We speak often on business issues, especially when it comes to real estate.
He is unbeatable when his client is right, and never takes a case unless he is sure they are.
HE WOULD NOT HAVE TAKEN ON THIS INTERCONTINENTAL BATTLE UNLESS HE IS ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN THAT HE CAN WIN!
I know of your Toain Mittleman,he is out of his league.
Mordecai Tendler,
You are getting very bad advice.
Your ego will destroy you and your family.
This is my advice to you.
Give it up!
Have your respective representatives meet in private.
Let both sides come up with a pareve statement that is ambiguous.
Fried is a big mentsch,he will encourage a respectable settlement.
Mordecai,
You are in way over your head.
Your father and all your uncles will not be able to help you.
Fried will absolutely crush you!
SETTLE,SETTLE,SETTLE!
You are still the rabbi of your shul, if you proceed with this nonsense you will lose your job.
You will join Moshe Londinski from Seattle in no man's land.
I hope you don't one day have to look at this blog, wishing that you should have listened to this anonymous blogger.
The problem is people do not listen to free advice, so send a check in my name to your local Tomchei Shabbos.
GIVE IT UP!
SAVE YOUR FAMILY FROM MORE GRIEF!SETTLE BEFORE YOUR LIFE WILL BECOME UNBEARABLE.posted by Un-Orthodox Jew | 12:05 AM | 36 comments
Rabbi Moshe Tendler And Rabbi Dovid Feinstein,
You are both New York boys, so no need for warm and fuzzy language.
You messed up big-time.
Instead of sitting down with Shmuel Fried and settling this matter, you let Mordecai and your egos get in the way of reality.
I warned Mordecai that Fried was going to CRUSH him. The legal action brought by Ms. Marmelstein has Fried's fingerprints all over it. He destroyed your son without himself or the RCA going to court.
Who do you think is behind this lawsuit. Who's idea was this and who encouraged her to proceed like this out of the blue??? Who do you think is advising her?
SHMUEL FRIED!!!!
You gotta be crazy to fight with Fried. He's doing this thirty some odd years and is a genius. Your family and all the good that it once represented will be turned into fertilizer.
And Fried has just begun, He will hit you from every direction imaginable.
He will pull witnesses out of his shtreimel that you never knew existed.
Mordecai will be facing criminal charges as well by the time Fried gets done with him. He has more tactics and strategies than Shlomo Hamelech had wives and concubines.
Proceed at the peril of "you" being accomplices in destroying your own family.
Sit down with Fried and settle, he can help you with the Marmelstein lawsuit, and pull the plug on his other tactics that will hit you in the head.
Pay no attention to Mordecai, he lost it years ago and needs serious help. You should force him to resign his job at KNH before he destroys that kehilla and whatever is left of your family's reputation.
Mordecai is lying to you; SETTLE WITH FRIED, SETTLE WITH THE RCA, SETTLE WITH MARMELSTEIN, GET THIS BEHIND YOU BEFORE THIS KILLS THE BOTH OF YOU.
I'm publising the Marmelstein lawsuit for shock value only. Perhaps Mordecai hid it from you. Read it carefully, PEOPLE DO NOT MAKE THIS STUFF UP. There is more coming, it will be relentless. SETTLE, SETTLE, SETTLE.
I wish you well,
UOJ
Case Against Rabbi Mordecai Tendler - Supreme Court of the State of New York County of New York
Supreme Court of the State of New York County of New York
Filed: December 20, 2005
Index No: 05117629
Plaintiff designates New York County as the place of trial
Summons
The basis of venue is plaintiff's residence
Plaintiff resides at:
(Address removed)
County of New York
Survivors Adina Marmelstein, Plaintiff,
-against-
Kehillat New Hempstead: The Rav Aron Jofen Community Synagogue, and
Mordecai Tendler, Defendant
To the above named Defendants:
You are hearby summoned to answer the compliant in this action and to serve a copy of our answer, or, if the complaint is not served with this summons, to serve a notice of appearance, on the Plaintiff's Attorney(s) within 20 days after the service of this summons, exclusive of the day of service for within 30 days after the service is complete in this summons is not personally delivered to you within the State of New York); and in case of failure to appear or answer, judgment will be taken against you by default for the relief demanded in the complaint.
Dated: New York, New York
December 20, 2005
Yours, etc., Kramer and Dunleavy, LLP
Attorneys for Plaintiff
Lenore Kramer, Esq.
A Member of the Firm
350 Braodway, Suite 1100
New York, New York 10013
(212) 226-6662
Defendants Addresses:
Kehillat New Hempstead: The Rav Aron Jofen
720 Union Road
New Hempstead, New York 10977
Mordecai Tendler
653 Union Road
Spring Valley, New York 10977
________________________
Page 2
Supreme Court of the State of New York County of New York
Verified Complaint
Filed December 20, 2005
Index No: 05117629
Survivors Name Adina Marmelstein, Plaintiff,
-against-
Kehillat New Hempstead: The Rav Aron Jofen Community Synagogue, and
Mordecai Tendler, Defendants.
Plaintiff, by her attorneys, KRAMMER & DUNLEAVY, LLP., complaining of the defendants, respectfully alleges, upon information and belief, as follows:
1. That at all times hereinafter mentioned, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE, was and still is a domestic not-for-profit corporation duly organized and existing pursuant to the Religious Corporation Law of the State of New York.
2. That at all times hereinafter mentioned, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE held itself open to members of the public as a place of worship, guidance and sanctuary.
3. Defendant MORDECAI TENDLER was and still is the founder and leader of defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE.
_________________
Page 3
4. Upon information and belief, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER was and still is an employee of defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE.
5. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER had a reputation as a scholar, educator and community leader within the Orthodox community.
6. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER held himself out to the public and to the plaintiff as a counselor and advisor with an expertise in women's issues.
7. That the plaintiff (SURVIVORS NAME REMOVED) first became acquainted with defendant MORDECAI TENDLER and his work on behalf of women in 1994.
8. That beginning in 1994, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) consulted by telephone with the defendant MORDECAI TENDLER on various personal issues.
9. That beginning in 1995, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER began to actively recruit plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) to join his congregation at defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE.
10. That in September, 1996, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) began attending services at defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE.
_______________
Page 4
11. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER took on the role of counselor and advisor to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) and did counsel and advise her with respect to her personal, legal and financial problems.
12. At all relevant times, a relationship of confidence and trust existed between the plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) and the defendant MORDECAI TENDLER.
13. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER represented to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that she was his "favorite" and his "closest."
14. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER represented to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that he would "be there" for all of her needs.
15. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER represented to the plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that he would assist her in finding a prospective husband so that she would be able to marry and have children, as she wished.
16. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER represented himself as an advisor, a father figure and a god to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED).
17. Beginning in November, 2001, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER began a sexual relationship with plaintiff (NAMED REMOVED).
________________
Page 5
18. That from November 2001 through May, 2005, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER had an ongoing sexual relationship with plaintiff (NAME REMOVED).
19. That prior to and throughout the duration of the aforsaid sexual relationship, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER advised plaintiff (NAME REMOVED)
that she was "close to the possiblity of finding a husband" and that she would never find a husband in her current state.
20. That prior to and throughout the duration of the aforesaid sexual relationship, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER advised plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) to permit him to have sexual intercourse with her so that her "life would open up and men would come" to her.
21. That prior to and throughout the duration of the afordsaid sexual relationship, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER advised plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that "Everything was closed" to her and that she should let him "open up her to the world."
22. At all relevant times, defendant "MORDECAI TENDLER advised plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that, if she had sexual intercourse with him, "doors would open," she would be "open up to meeting men" and she "would get married and have children."
23. That from November 2001 through May, 2005, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER had sexual relations with plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) at
________________
Page 6
various locations, including in his rabbinical study at defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE.
24. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER told plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that he "was as close to God as anyone could get."
25. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER told plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that he "talks to God all the time."
26. At all relevant times, defendant "MORDECAI TENDLER told plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that he "was the Messiah."
27. That plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was induced to engage in this physical relationship with defendant MORDECAI TENDLER as part of a course of sexual therapy which he represented would lead to her achieving her goals of marriage and children.
28. At all relevant times, defendant (MORDECAI TENDLER warned plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that, if she told anyone about the sexual therapy, he "would have her placed in a straight jacket," "have her put in the penitentiary" and/or "have her thrown in jail."
29. At all relevant times, defendant "MORDECAI TENDLER warned plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that, if she told anyone about the sexual therapy, he "would have her banned from the shul (synagogue)" and "would turn the community against her."
________________
Page 7
30. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER advised plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that engaging in sexual relations with him, was her "only hope" to open her up to become receptive to men.
31. At all relevant times, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) believed the words, advice and threats of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER.
32. That once plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) submitted to his course of sexual therapy, rather than assisting her to reach her goals of marriage and children, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER physically and emotionally abused plaintiff for his own sexual pleasure and gratification.
AS AND FOR A FIRST CAUSE OF ACTION FOR FRAUD
33. Plaintiff repeats and reiterates each and every allegation contained in paragraphs 1 though 32 inclusive, with the same force and effect as in specifically set forth herein at length.
34. That the aforesaid representations made by defendant MORDECAI TENDLER to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) were false and reckless.
35. That at the time he made the aforesaid representations, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER knew them to be false and reckless.
36. That defendant MORDECAI TENDLER made the aforesaid representations with the express intent to deceive plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) and induce her into a sexual relationship with him.
________________
Page 8
37. That in knowingly making the aforesaid false and reckless representations to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED), defendant MORDECAI TENDLER took unfair advantage of his position as her counselor and advisor.
38. Plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) relied on the false and reckless misrepresentation of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER and engaged in sexual relations with him.
39. That had plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) known that the course of sexual therapy advised by defendant MORDECAI TENDLER was solely for his personal pleasure and gratification, she would not have engaged in sexual relations with him.
40. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was physically violated, had her reputation impugned, was ostracized from her synagogue and has lost her standing in the community.
41. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) has been injured and damaged in a sum which exceeds the jurisdictional limitations of all the lower Courts that would otherwise have jurisdiction over this action.
AS AND FOR THE SECOND CAUSE OF ACTION FOR BREACH OF FIDUCIARY DUTY
42. Plaintiff repeats and reiterates each and every allegation contained in paragraphs 1 through 41 inclusive, with the same force wand effect as if specifically set forth herein at length.
________________
Page 9
43. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER occupied a position as fiduciary to the plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) as her counselor, advisor and therapist and owed her a relationship of trust and confidence.
44. That as a result of the foregoing, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER breached his fiduciary duty to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED).
45. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was physically violated, had her reputation impugned, was ostracized from her synagogue and lost her standing in the community.
46. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was caused to and has suffered and sustained severe and serious personal injuries, severe and serious conscious pain and suffering, severe and serious mental distress and anguish and attendant economic losses.
47. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) has been injured and damaged in a sum which exceeds the jurisdictional limitations of all lower Courts that would other wise have jurisdiction over this action.
AS AND FOR THE THIRD CAUSE OF ACTION FOR INTENTIONAL INFLICTION OF EMOTIONAL DISTRESS
48. Plaintiff repeats and reiterates each and every allegation contained in paragraph 1 through 47 inclusive, with the same force and effect as if specifically set forth herein at length.
________________
Page 10
49. Defendant MORDECAI TENDLER encouraged his congregates at defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE, to harass, threaten and intimidate plaintiff (NAME REMOVED).
50. The congregates at defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE did harass, threaten and intimidate plaintiff (NAME REMOVED).
51. Defendant MORDECAI TENDLER engaged in a concerted scheme to embarrass, humiliate and diminish plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) in the orthodox community so as to injure her reputation and destroy her credibility.
52. Defendant MORDECAI TENDLER knew, or should have known, that his actions towards plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) in falsely inducing her into a sexual relationship, in physically violating and abusing her, in causing her to be harassed, threatened, intimidated and ostracized from the community and in intentionally injuring her reputation and standing in the community would result in serious emotional distress, pain and suffering to her.
53. In doing the actions hereinabove alleged, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER acted with willful, wanton, reckless, intentional and deliberate disregard for the likelihood that plaintiff would suffer severe emotional distress, pain and suffering as a direct and proximate result of his actions.
________________
Page 11
54. The aforementioned wrongful conduct of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER was extreme and outrageous and went beyond all bounds of civility and decency.
55. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was caused to suffer severe mental and emotional distress, pain and suffering.
56. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) has been injured and damaged in a sum which exceeds the jurisdictional limitations of all lower Courts that would otherwise have jurisdiction over this action.
AS AND FOR A FOURTH CAUSE OF ACTION FOR NEGLIGENT INFLICTION OF EMOTIONAL DISTRESS
57. Plaintiff repeats and reiterate each and every allegation contained in paragraphs 1 through 56 inclusive, with the same force and effect as if specifically set forth herein at length.
58. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER was aware that plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) trusted him, relied on him and placed her confidence in him.
58. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER knew or should have known that his actions would cause her severe mental and emotional distress, pain and suffering.
________________
Page 12
59. That as a result of defendant's actions, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was caused to suffer severe mental and emotional distress, pain and suffering.
60. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) has been injured and damaged in a sum which exceeds the jurisdictional limitations of all lower Courts that would otherwise have jurisdiction over this action.
AS AND FOR A FIFTH CAUSE OF ACTION FOR NEGLIGENT RETENTION
61. Plaintiff repeats and reiterates each and every allegation contained in paragraphs 1 through 60 inclusive, with the same force and effect as if specifically set forth herein at length.
62. At all relevant times, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE was aware of the aforesaid conduct and actions of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER.
63. At all relevant times, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE knew or should have known of propensity of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER for the aforesaid conduct.
64. At all relevant times, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE knew or should
________________
Page 13
have known that defendant MORDECAI TENDLER used his rabbinical study at the synagogue to conduct his sexual therapy sessions with congregation members.
65. At all relevant times, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE knew of facts that would lead a predent party to investigate the use by defendant MORDECAI TENDLER of his rabbinical study at the synagogue.
66. At all relevant times, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE had notice of prior allegations of inappropriate sexual conduct by defendant MORDECAI TENDLER.
67. That in spite of the aforesaid notice of prior allegations of inappropriate sexual conduct by defendant MORDECAI TENDLER, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE took no steps to warn or protect plaintiff and other female congregants, to adequately supervise defendant, to remove defendant from his position of authority or to make an appropriate investigation.
68. That defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE, was grossly negligent as follows: in failing to properly and adequately supervise the activities of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER; in failing to use reasonable care to correct the conduct of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER; in failing to remove defendant MORDECAI TENDLER was an employee; in failing to conduct an adequate and appropriate investigation; in
________________
Page 14
failing to warn congregants of in failing to take the steps necessary to have prevented the fraud and assault on plaintiff; and, in further failing to exercise that degree of due care as a reasonable party under the same or similar circumstances.
69. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was physically violated, had her reputation impugned, was ostracized from her synagogue and lost her standing in the community.
70. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was caused to and has suffered and sustained severe and serious personal injuries, severe and serious conscious pain and suffering, severe and serious mental distress and anguish and attendant economic losses.
71. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) is entitled to recover punitive damages from and against defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE.
72. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) has been injured and damaged in a sum which exceeds the jurisdictional limitations of all lower Courts that would otherwise have jurisdiction over this action.
WHEREFORE, plaintiff demands judgment against defendants KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE and MORDECAI TENDLER for both compensatory and punitive damages in the sum which exceeds the jurisdictional limitations of all lower Courts that would.
________________
Page 15
otherwise have jurisdiction over this action and is within the jurisdiction of this Court
Dated: New York, New York
December 20, 2005
Yours, etc.,
KRAMER & DUNLEAVY, L.L.P.
By Lenore Kramer
A Member of the Firm
Attorneys for Plaintiff
Office and Post Office Address
350 Broadway - Suite 1100
New York, New York 10013
(212) 226-6662
________________
Page 16
VERIFICATION
STATE OF NEW YORK )
:ss
COUNTY OF NEW YORK)
I, the undersigned, an attorney admitted to practice in the Courts of New York State, state that I am a member of the firm of KRAMER & DUNLEAVY, L.L.P. attorneys for the plaintiff in the within action; I have read the foregoing verified complain and know the contents thereof; the same is true to my own knowledge, except as to the matters therein stated to be alleged on information and belief, and as to those matters I believe it to be true. The reason this verification is made by me and not by plaintiff, is because the plaintiff is not now within the County where deponent maintains her offices.
The grounds of my belief as to all matters not stated upon my own knowledge are as follows:
Conversations with plaintiff and a review of the file maintained at my office on this matter.
I affirm that the foregoing statements are true, under the penalties of perjury.
Dated: New York, New York
December 20, 2005
Lenore Kramer
This is the open letter I published July 20, a mere five months ago, urging Mordecai to settle this issue with the RCA. Please read it very carefully. I will direct a new letter to you at the end of the July letter to Mordecai.
(I urge readers to go back to July 20, click on the comments, and see how wrong you were for blasting me. I'm talking particularly to a few "bigshot" bloggers who have as much brains as the amoeba and apes they came from).
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
An Open Letter To Mordecai Tendler
I have no idea whether you are guilty or innocent of the many charges against you.
I do assume innocence,although the latest developments with the RCA causes me to pause.
I do not have a horse in this race.
I do not have a kugel in this oven.
I do not have a black hat on this head.
So for starters you need to know I hope you are innocent.
I did not say I hope you are" found "innocent,because the only thing you can be" found" is guilty.
You know what the score is. Either you are guilty or innocent,there is no gray area.
I do know what this fight with the RCA represents, and that makes me a nogaih b'dovor, because whatever the outcome of this matter, all streams of Orthodox Jewry will be affected.
Trying to avoid the well known cliche, I have come up with my own.
WHERE THERE IS CHOLENT,THERE IS HEARTBURN!
The above is a general rule that I learned throughout my own trials and tribulations that life offers. I sense that there is something here that does not quite meet the proverbial eye.
You have waited way too long to come out swinging. These rumors have been swirling around for years.
Why pick a fight with an adversary that you can not beat? You can NOT beat them!
They will destroy whatever is left of your reputation.
I am not saying you should not be defending yourself, but this Israeli bais din gimmick sounds and feels like camouflage and subterfuge.
I know Rabbi Shmuel Fried extremely well. He is the toain or attorney for the RCA.
A few things you must know about this guy.
HE IS THE SMARTEST AND SHREWDEST TOAIN ALIVE TODAY.
We speak often on business issues, especially when it comes to real estate.
He is unbeatable when his client is right, and never takes a case unless he is sure they are.
HE WOULD NOT HAVE TAKEN ON THIS INTERCONTINENTAL BATTLE UNLESS HE IS ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN THAT HE CAN WIN!
I know of your Toain Mittleman,he is out of his league.
Mordecai Tendler,
You are getting very bad advice.
Your ego will destroy you and your family.
This is my advice to you.
Give it up!
Have your respective representatives meet in private.
Let both sides come up with a pareve statement that is ambiguous.
Fried is a big mentsch,he will encourage a respectable settlement.
Mordecai,
You are in way over your head.
Your father and all your uncles will not be able to help you.
Fried will absolutely crush you!
SETTLE,SETTLE,SETTLE!
You are still the rabbi of your shul, if you proceed with this nonsense you will lose your job.
You will join Moshe Londinski from Seattle in no man's land.
I hope you don't one day have to look at this blog, wishing that you should have listened to this anonymous blogger.
The problem is people do not listen to free advice, so send a check in my name to your local Tomchei Shabbos.
GIVE IT UP!
SAVE YOUR FAMILY FROM MORE GRIEF!SETTLE BEFORE YOUR LIFE WILL BECOME UNBEARABLE.posted by Un-Orthodox Jew | 12:05 AM | 36 comments
Rabbi Moshe Tendler And Rabbi Dovid Feinstein,
You are both New York boys, so no need for warm and fuzzy language.
You messed up big-time.
Instead of sitting down with Shmuel Fried and settling this matter, you let Mordecai and your egos get in the way of reality.
I warned Mordecai that Fried was going to CRUSH him. The legal action brought by Ms. Marmelstein has Fried's fingerprints all over it. He destroyed your son without himself or the RCA going to court.
Who do you think is behind this lawsuit. Who's idea was this and who encouraged her to proceed like this out of the blue??? Who do you think is advising her?
SHMUEL FRIED!!!!
You gotta be crazy to fight with Fried. He's doing this thirty some odd years and is a genius. Your family and all the good that it once represented will be turned into fertilizer.
And Fried has just begun, He will hit you from every direction imaginable.
He will pull witnesses out of his shtreimel that you never knew existed.
Mordecai will be facing criminal charges as well by the time Fried gets done with him. He has more tactics and strategies than Shlomo Hamelech had wives and concubines.
Proceed at the peril of "you" being accomplices in destroying your own family.
Sit down with Fried and settle, he can help you with the Marmelstein lawsuit, and pull the plug on his other tactics that will hit you in the head.
Pay no attention to Mordecai, he lost it years ago and needs serious help. You should force him to resign his job at KNH before he destroys that kehilla and whatever is left of your family's reputation.
Mordecai is lying to you; SETTLE WITH FRIED, SETTLE WITH THE RCA, SETTLE WITH MARMELSTEIN, GET THIS BEHIND YOU BEFORE THIS KILLS THE BOTH OF YOU.
I'm publising the Marmelstein lawsuit for shock value only. Perhaps Mordecai hid it from you. Read it carefully, PEOPLE DO NOT MAKE THIS STUFF UP. There is more coming, it will be relentless. SETTLE, SETTLE, SETTLE.
I wish you well,
UOJ
Case Against Rabbi Mordecai Tendler - Supreme Court of the State of New York County of New York
Supreme Court of the State of New York County of New York
Filed: December 20, 2005
Index No: 05117629
Plaintiff designates New York County as the place of trial
Summons
The basis of venue is plaintiff's residence
Plaintiff resides at:
(Address removed)
County of New York
Survivors Adina Marmelstein, Plaintiff,
-against-
Kehillat New Hempstead: The Rav Aron Jofen Community Synagogue, and
Mordecai Tendler, Defendant
To the above named Defendants:
You are hearby summoned to answer the compliant in this action and to serve a copy of our answer, or, if the complaint is not served with this summons, to serve a notice of appearance, on the Plaintiff's Attorney(s) within 20 days after the service of this summons, exclusive of the day of service for within 30 days after the service is complete in this summons is not personally delivered to you within the State of New York); and in case of failure to appear or answer, judgment will be taken against you by default for the relief demanded in the complaint.
Dated: New York, New York
December 20, 2005
Yours, etc., Kramer and Dunleavy, LLP
Attorneys for Plaintiff
Lenore Kramer, Esq.
A Member of the Firm
350 Braodway, Suite 1100
New York, New York 10013
(212) 226-6662
Defendants Addresses:
Kehillat New Hempstead: The Rav Aron Jofen
720 Union Road
New Hempstead, New York 10977
Mordecai Tendler
653 Union Road
Spring Valley, New York 10977
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Supreme Court of the State of New York County of New York
Verified Complaint
Filed December 20, 2005
Index No: 05117629
Survivors Name Adina Marmelstein, Plaintiff,
-against-
Kehillat New Hempstead: The Rav Aron Jofen Community Synagogue, and
Mordecai Tendler, Defendants.
Plaintiff, by her attorneys, KRAMMER & DUNLEAVY, LLP., complaining of the defendants, respectfully alleges, upon information and belief, as follows:
1. That at all times hereinafter mentioned, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE, was and still is a domestic not-for-profit corporation duly organized and existing pursuant to the Religious Corporation Law of the State of New York.
2. That at all times hereinafter mentioned, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE held itself open to members of the public as a place of worship, guidance and sanctuary.
3. Defendant MORDECAI TENDLER was and still is the founder and leader of defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE.
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4. Upon information and belief, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER was and still is an employee of defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE.
5. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER had a reputation as a scholar, educator and community leader within the Orthodox community.
6. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER held himself out to the public and to the plaintiff as a counselor and advisor with an expertise in women's issues.
7. That the plaintiff (SURVIVORS NAME REMOVED) first became acquainted with defendant MORDECAI TENDLER and his work on behalf of women in 1994.
8. That beginning in 1994, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) consulted by telephone with the defendant MORDECAI TENDLER on various personal issues.
9. That beginning in 1995, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER began to actively recruit plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) to join his congregation at defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE.
10. That in September, 1996, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) began attending services at defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE.
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11. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER took on the role of counselor and advisor to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) and did counsel and advise her with respect to her personal, legal and financial problems.
12. At all relevant times, a relationship of confidence and trust existed between the plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) and the defendant MORDECAI TENDLER.
13. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER represented to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that she was his "favorite" and his "closest."
14. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER represented to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that he would "be there" for all of her needs.
15. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER represented to the plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that he would assist her in finding a prospective husband so that she would be able to marry and have children, as she wished.
16. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER represented himself as an advisor, a father figure and a god to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED).
17. Beginning in November, 2001, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER began a sexual relationship with plaintiff (NAMED REMOVED).
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18. That from November 2001 through May, 2005, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER had an ongoing sexual relationship with plaintiff (NAME REMOVED).
19. That prior to and throughout the duration of the aforsaid sexual relationship, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER advised plaintiff (NAME REMOVED)
that she was "close to the possiblity of finding a husband" and that she would never find a husband in her current state.
20. That prior to and throughout the duration of the aforesaid sexual relationship, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER advised plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) to permit him to have sexual intercourse with her so that her "life would open up and men would come" to her.
21. That prior to and throughout the duration of the afordsaid sexual relationship, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER advised plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that "Everything was closed" to her and that she should let him "open up her to the world."
22. At all relevant times, defendant "MORDECAI TENDLER advised plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that, if she had sexual intercourse with him, "doors would open," she would be "open up to meeting men" and she "would get married and have children."
23. That from November 2001 through May, 2005, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER had sexual relations with plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) at
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various locations, including in his rabbinical study at defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE.
24. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER told plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that he "was as close to God as anyone could get."
25. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER told plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that he "talks to God all the time."
26. At all relevant times, defendant "MORDECAI TENDLER told plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that he "was the Messiah."
27. That plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was induced to engage in this physical relationship with defendant MORDECAI TENDLER as part of a course of sexual therapy which he represented would lead to her achieving her goals of marriage and children.
28. At all relevant times, defendant (MORDECAI TENDLER warned plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that, if she told anyone about the sexual therapy, he "would have her placed in a straight jacket," "have her put in the penitentiary" and/or "have her thrown in jail."
29. At all relevant times, defendant "MORDECAI TENDLER warned plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that, if she told anyone about the sexual therapy, he "would have her banned from the shul (synagogue)" and "would turn the community against her."
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30. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER advised plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) that engaging in sexual relations with him, was her "only hope" to open her up to become receptive to men.
31. At all relevant times, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) believed the words, advice and threats of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER.
32. That once plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) submitted to his course of sexual therapy, rather than assisting her to reach her goals of marriage and children, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER physically and emotionally abused plaintiff for his own sexual pleasure and gratification.
AS AND FOR A FIRST CAUSE OF ACTION FOR FRAUD
33. Plaintiff repeats and reiterates each and every allegation contained in paragraphs 1 though 32 inclusive, with the same force and effect as in specifically set forth herein at length.
34. That the aforesaid representations made by defendant MORDECAI TENDLER to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) were false and reckless.
35. That at the time he made the aforesaid representations, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER knew them to be false and reckless.
36. That defendant MORDECAI TENDLER made the aforesaid representations with the express intent to deceive plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) and induce her into a sexual relationship with him.
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37. That in knowingly making the aforesaid false and reckless representations to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED), defendant MORDECAI TENDLER took unfair advantage of his position as her counselor and advisor.
38. Plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) relied on the false and reckless misrepresentation of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER and engaged in sexual relations with him.
39. That had plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) known that the course of sexual therapy advised by defendant MORDECAI TENDLER was solely for his personal pleasure and gratification, she would not have engaged in sexual relations with him.
40. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was physically violated, had her reputation impugned, was ostracized from her synagogue and has lost her standing in the community.
41. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) has been injured and damaged in a sum which exceeds the jurisdictional limitations of all the lower Courts that would otherwise have jurisdiction over this action.
AS AND FOR THE SECOND CAUSE OF ACTION FOR BREACH OF FIDUCIARY DUTY
42. Plaintiff repeats and reiterates each and every allegation contained in paragraphs 1 through 41 inclusive, with the same force wand effect as if specifically set forth herein at length.
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43. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER occupied a position as fiduciary to the plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) as her counselor, advisor and therapist and owed her a relationship of trust and confidence.
44. That as a result of the foregoing, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER breached his fiduciary duty to plaintiff (NAME REMOVED).
45. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was physically violated, had her reputation impugned, was ostracized from her synagogue and lost her standing in the community.
46. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was caused to and has suffered and sustained severe and serious personal injuries, severe and serious conscious pain and suffering, severe and serious mental distress and anguish and attendant economic losses.
47. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) has been injured and damaged in a sum which exceeds the jurisdictional limitations of all lower Courts that would other wise have jurisdiction over this action.
AS AND FOR THE THIRD CAUSE OF ACTION FOR INTENTIONAL INFLICTION OF EMOTIONAL DISTRESS
48. Plaintiff repeats and reiterates each and every allegation contained in paragraph 1 through 47 inclusive, with the same force and effect as if specifically set forth herein at length.
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49. Defendant MORDECAI TENDLER encouraged his congregates at defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE, to harass, threaten and intimidate plaintiff (NAME REMOVED).
50. The congregates at defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE did harass, threaten and intimidate plaintiff (NAME REMOVED).
51. Defendant MORDECAI TENDLER engaged in a concerted scheme to embarrass, humiliate and diminish plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) in the orthodox community so as to injure her reputation and destroy her credibility.
52. Defendant MORDECAI TENDLER knew, or should have known, that his actions towards plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) in falsely inducing her into a sexual relationship, in physically violating and abusing her, in causing her to be harassed, threatened, intimidated and ostracized from the community and in intentionally injuring her reputation and standing in the community would result in serious emotional distress, pain and suffering to her.
53. In doing the actions hereinabove alleged, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER acted with willful, wanton, reckless, intentional and deliberate disregard for the likelihood that plaintiff would suffer severe emotional distress, pain and suffering as a direct and proximate result of his actions.
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54. The aforementioned wrongful conduct of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER was extreme and outrageous and went beyond all bounds of civility and decency.
55. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was caused to suffer severe mental and emotional distress, pain and suffering.
56. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) has been injured and damaged in a sum which exceeds the jurisdictional limitations of all lower Courts that would otherwise have jurisdiction over this action.
AS AND FOR A FOURTH CAUSE OF ACTION FOR NEGLIGENT INFLICTION OF EMOTIONAL DISTRESS
57. Plaintiff repeats and reiterate each and every allegation contained in paragraphs 1 through 56 inclusive, with the same force and effect as if specifically set forth herein at length.
58. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER was aware that plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) trusted him, relied on him and placed her confidence in him.
58. At all relevant times, defendant MORDECAI TENDLER knew or should have known that his actions would cause her severe mental and emotional distress, pain and suffering.
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59. That as a result of defendant's actions, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was caused to suffer severe mental and emotional distress, pain and suffering.
60. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) has been injured and damaged in a sum which exceeds the jurisdictional limitations of all lower Courts that would otherwise have jurisdiction over this action.
AS AND FOR A FIFTH CAUSE OF ACTION FOR NEGLIGENT RETENTION
61. Plaintiff repeats and reiterates each and every allegation contained in paragraphs 1 through 60 inclusive, with the same force and effect as if specifically set forth herein at length.
62. At all relevant times, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE was aware of the aforesaid conduct and actions of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER.
63. At all relevant times, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE knew or should have known of propensity of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER for the aforesaid conduct.
64. At all relevant times, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE knew or should
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have known that defendant MORDECAI TENDLER used his rabbinical study at the synagogue to conduct his sexual therapy sessions with congregation members.
65. At all relevant times, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE knew of facts that would lead a predent party to investigate the use by defendant MORDECAI TENDLER of his rabbinical study at the synagogue.
66. At all relevant times, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE had notice of prior allegations of inappropriate sexual conduct by defendant MORDECAI TENDLER.
67. That in spite of the aforesaid notice of prior allegations of inappropriate sexual conduct by defendant MORDECAI TENDLER, defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE took no steps to warn or protect plaintiff and other female congregants, to adequately supervise defendant, to remove defendant from his position of authority or to make an appropriate investigation.
68. That defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE, was grossly negligent as follows: in failing to properly and adequately supervise the activities of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER; in failing to use reasonable care to correct the conduct of defendant MORDECAI TENDLER; in failing to remove defendant MORDECAI TENDLER was an employee; in failing to conduct an adequate and appropriate investigation; in
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failing to warn congregants of in failing to take the steps necessary to have prevented the fraud and assault on plaintiff; and, in further failing to exercise that degree of due care as a reasonable party under the same or similar circumstances.
69. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was physically violated, had her reputation impugned, was ostracized from her synagogue and lost her standing in the community.
70. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) was caused to and has suffered and sustained severe and serious personal injuries, severe and serious conscious pain and suffering, severe and serious mental distress and anguish and attendant economic losses.
71. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) is entitled to recover punitive damages from and against defendant KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE.
72. That as a result of the foregoing, plaintiff (NAME REMOVED) has been injured and damaged in a sum which exceeds the jurisdictional limitations of all lower Courts that would otherwise have jurisdiction over this action.
WHEREFORE, plaintiff demands judgment against defendants KEHILLAT NEW HEMPSTEAD: THE RAV ARON JOFEN COMMUNITY SYNAGOGUE and MORDECAI TENDLER for both compensatory and punitive damages in the sum which exceeds the jurisdictional limitations of all lower Courts that would.
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otherwise have jurisdiction over this action and is within the jurisdiction of this Court
Dated: New York, New York
December 20, 2005
Yours, etc.,
KRAMER & DUNLEAVY, L.L.P.
By Lenore Kramer
A Member of the Firm
Attorneys for Plaintiff
Office and Post Office Address
350 Broadway - Suite 1100
New York, New York 10013
(212) 226-6662
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VERIFICATION
STATE OF NEW YORK )
:ss
COUNTY OF NEW YORK)
I, the undersigned, an attorney admitted to practice in the Courts of New York State, state that I am a member of the firm of KRAMER & DUNLEAVY, L.L.P. attorneys for the plaintiff in the within action; I have read the foregoing verified complain and know the contents thereof; the same is true to my own knowledge, except as to the matters therein stated to be alleged on information and belief, and as to those matters I believe it to be true. The reason this verification is made by me and not by plaintiff, is because the plaintiff is not now within the County where deponent maintains her offices.
The grounds of my belief as to all matters not stated upon my own knowledge are as follows:
Conversations with plaintiff and a review of the file maintained at my office on this matter.
I affirm that the foregoing statements are true, under the penalties of perjury.
Dated: New York, New York
December 20, 2005
Lenore Kramer
110 Comments:
Imagine if this does go to a criminal trial and MT is convicted and sentenced to Rikers!
The boyz in da hood are going to have a field day with MT's tuchis and other body parts. Going to get very messy, indeed.
I can just see them shtupping a broomstick up the "Messiah"s tuchis. Not a pretty sight.
Boog - you are too much! Are you frum?
Boog:
While the allegations are certainly unseemly to say the least, they do not rise to the level of being criminal. Nor should this behavior be criminal.
The plaintiff consented to have sex with Tendler. Her consent was based blatant misrepresentations and manipulation by Tendler. However, I suspect that in a substantial percentage of relationships there is some misrepresentation and manipulation on the part one or both partners. We would be making virtually all relationships illegal if we deemed misrepresentation and manipulation a crime.
VFB,
Your argument is the standard defense argument that generally loses in a courtroom.
There is more than enough prima facie evidence for a D.A. to take a good look at this case.
Depends who you ask. One person's "frum" is another's "shaigetz".
And if you think for a moment that homosexual behavior doesn't go on among the "frummer" incarcerateds up in Otisville, I have a bridge in Brooklyn for your purchasing consideration.
BTW, UO, re-read your 7/20 blog as well as the extensive commentaries and references by JWB on another blog that he participates in, to both this RMT case as well as other cases of sexual harassment and intimidation. One salient point emerges as a constant: All of the accuseds fight down to the bitter end. None of these miscreants have ever followed the advice from that famous Kenny Roger's song: "Ya gotta know when to hold them, and when to fold 'em."
Looks like RMT won't be any different and is going with this right down to the last flickering candle.
UO, your advice to RMT won't be heeded, IMO. It is really incredible how the RCA has tiptoed and navigated around RMT throughout this saga. What about the lives of the victims? Their broken families? Their kaput marriages? The cuckolded husbands? Where do they go from here? How do they put their lives back together?
All of these organizations seem to care more for the Kavod and welfare of the accused than for the victims. When will we stop sweeping this shit under our rugs and not be afraid to report these sordid behaviors to the proper authorities?
Vivid constantly in my memory is the case of MO-FO Bryks of Winnipeg fame and the damage he caused to countless kinderlach. Who will ever forget nor should we, Daniel Levin, who hung himself because he could never get over the molestation he suffered at the hands of Bryks. This piece of human excrement is still walking the streets a free man.
Dayenu.
Perhaps sending one of these Mo-Fo's up to Riker's for some R&R will be the deterrent that will put an end, once and for all to these cases of molestation. Our communities are certainly not doing the job and our children and spouses are suffering.
Boog,
Agreed, there's plenty of blame to go around.
Ou-Lanner, Rca-Tendler, Margulies-Kolko; it's like the victims don't count until their asses are nailed to the wall.
--- There is more than enough prima facie evidence for a D.A. to take a good look at this case. ---
There is no evidence of forcible sex here. Nowhere does the plaintiff allege such a thing in the complaint. There are allegations of manipulation and misrepresentation to cause her to have sex with him. Manipulation and misrepresentation do not give rise to criminal charges of rape. See the law review article at the link below for an overview of the matter.
www.spr.org/pdf/Falk.pdf
If you would like a New York precedent see People v. Hough 159 Misc.2d 997, 607 N.Y.S.2d 884. In that case someone impersonated his twin brother to have sex with his twin brother’s girlfriend. The court found that there was no rape, because there neither “forcible compulsion or the complainant's incapacity to consent.”
For the last five years the "pundits" and "mavens" all predicted in Spring Training that the Yankees were going to the World Series and even win it. All of the History, the fabled lore, George the Owner, the indisputably strong team on the field.
But that's why the games are actually played.
Let the RMT Trial begin.
VFB,
Let's just say that all has not been said yet.
There are MANY women who are "thinking" about going public.
How does it happen that a grandson of Rav Moshe,zl will even be accused of such behavior?Where does the delusional thoughts of being superior come from?Was Reb moshe made into a G-d, and therefore whatever a relative does is Ok?Lets hope its all false.But if its true,we are in big trouble!
If he settles it will be for some good cash?I do not want the cash coming from my pocket.If he needs help, he should get it.What will happen to his family,the children?
The disgrace is beyond belief.I always feel that being raised in
a simple jewish home is sometimes the best thing.Just simple faith.
No delusions about who you are.
I am seeing information regarding the purveyor of lashon hara on the Internet
known as Jewish Whistleblower.
Please come to:
www.stop-jewish-whistleblower.com
Who knows what else is coming out of left field from the Fried group?
So far RMT has not been able to shake this nor did they forsee this lawsuit coming.
The pro RMT Jewish Press was very uncharacteristically quiet this week.
Wonder why?
reb baby;
Take a long cold shower.
Gut voch.
Go onto rabbinicintegrity.blospot.com for the 8-page English "summary translation" of a Responsa authored by Rabbi Wosner, joined in by seven additional Monsey rabbis. An excerpt:
"Numerous Rabbis sat together and heard audio tapes, where this 'Rabbi' attempts to seduce married (and unmarried) women (Hashem, please protect us). On one particular tape one can clearly hear a married woman begging the 'Rabbi' to leave her alone.
Accordingly, the RCA had every right to oust this Rabbi from their organizatihn, and his own Congregation has the same obligation!"
Also - go onto the RCA website, rabbis.org, and click onto, "Clarification Regarding Rabbi M Tendler and Bet Din". It makes the Israeli beis din look very foolish.
The circle is tightening around this guy.
I've lost nearly all respect I had for Rabbis Dovid and Reuven Feinstein.
Mordy Tendler is one very, very sick, sick guy. The immorality was bad enough, but to keep lying like this, and to so many people - maybe these latest Internet postings will end it - and the Jewish Press campaign as well.
I thought Jewish Whistleblower.blogspot ended in July 2005. Am I missing something?
It did, but he's around posting on other blogs.
Seeker,
Unfortunately, bad apples wind up in the best of families.
To think that MT was at R' Moshe's side for so many years makes me sick.
Rodef,
I think R' Dovid is truly clueless.
You don't see his brother Reuvain running around defending MT.
rodef;
I'm with you.
Let's hope that this blog as well some others that are now relentlessly pursuing these molesters will bring them what they so richly deserve.
A very, very sad commentary on our rabbinic "leaders" who are more concerned with bugs in the water, romaine lettuce, Indian hair sheitlach,
how many companies they can get under their ha$gocho, and meziza B'Peh. F--k you all.
We have emotionally, psychologically, and developmentally damaged kids in our midst from these bastard sex predators and our rabbinic "leaders" counsel and advice to us is always the same: Keep it quiet, it's loshon hora, motzee shem ra and similar tinofes bullshit.
From that son of a bitch mother f--ker Monderowitz who just managed to get out of the U.S. to Israel before the Feds reeled him in(Mohel Fisher should give him a meziza B'Peh or better yet, cut it off all-together)to Bryks, Lanner, Kolko, Carelbach etc., ad infinitum, ad nauseum, we have, unfortunately, A Hall of Shame.
Had we only true Yosher rabbinic leadership to spearhead a drive to report these SOB's, who knows how many children and families could have been saved. After 120 years, you "rabbi" shmucks will have to give a rechunung upstairs.
Bring along a good flame retardant suit.
Boog, you sound like an idiot. Rodef emmes has it pretty close. This has been going on a long time here in New Hempstead. Ms. Marmelstein is just one of many. Those of you who think there is some type of conspiracy, or this has anything to do with the RCA, or Fried, are wrong. Ms. Marmelstein is acting of her own accord. In order to win in court (and this case has NO chance of leading to a criminal prosecution) Ms. Marmelstein will have to show that New York State recognizes a cause of action for sexual harrassment against clergymen...an iffy proposition, since this law usually applies to employers. There may be some interesting case law made here, if the case proceeds to trial.
UOJ, Boog, etc.
Gam zu l'tova - its weird to say, but it is kind of neat to see the Monsey Chassidim and the RCA working together. Who knows, maybe something good will come out of this.
I agree with the other blogger, though, about a criminal case being unlikely. Its a case of two adults consenting to sex - not a crime. Yes, one is clergy, and the other one is a troubled congregant seeking counseling - but I haven't heard that being a crime. Psychologists get sued for this kind of thing all the time, but they don't get prosecuted. Its a civil offense, not a crime.
Here's my prediction. Mordy Tendler is going down. He'll be fired from his synagogue. The RCA ouster will stand.
Elul,
Yup, even the civil case against Mordy is iffy.
The case against the synagogue may actually be better.
Good night, guys.
A freiliche Chanukah, a gut Chodesh, a gut voch.
Hey, UOJ, How about posting something positive, warm and fuzzy? Too much negativity is no good.
Lyla tov.
elul-lulu; you low-life shmuck.
I'll try to find out if the Reading Comp. class over at Machon L'Parnassah in B.P. still has a seat to accomodate you.
This trial and it's attendent publicity will bring light and hopefully action against the sex predators in our community that now ply their sickness with impunity knowing that they have Protekzia and cover-up from 'rabbinic leaders' and their employers. If it spurs to action one Rabbi or rabbinic group that says that's it's OK to come forward if you believe your spouse or child has been molested by one of these pervs, much will have been accomplished and the floodgates will open.
Take your case-law up to your ivory tower, cone-head, and shove it up your hairy tuchis.
Thanks, JWB.
Perhaps our rabbinic leadership will take note and change their ways.
JWB,
Your comments are welcome here.
Boog, 11:35
Right on the money.
Boog, and UOJ, calling me names eh? Wow, I'm devestated.
Over onto the Tendler thing, it is not so cut and dry. If the victim can't sustain acase, it may be dismissed. It is unlikely, also, that any prior settlement with a third party can be "opened up" and used as evidence in this case. The bottom line, at this point, is yet another female has come forward, publicly, and claimed that RMT made moves on her, in this case, a four year sexual relationship, based on the fact that he is the Messiah among other similarly bizarre claims. There are many other details that I will leave to others to put into writing. UOJ, you should get your hands on the two booklets that were mailed out to thousands of Monsey families this past week. Also, the RCA and the Chassidic rabbonim are not "cooperating". These charges against RMT are just reverberating in from many different directions, independently. Wake up people. Do you have any idea of the devestation this series of scandals has caused Jewish families?
In addition to the Reading Comp class,elly baby, you should also learn how to spell. Quote by Elul:
"Wake up people. Do you have any idea of the devestation this series of scandals has caused Jewish families?"
Exactly our (UO, JWB) point. So, sex predator apologist why are you talking out of both sides of your arse?
RMT is a SOB who repeatedly abused his position and took clear advantage of his clients.
Now it's time to tell it to the Judge.
As for the pamplets and leaflets, let's make sure that there is no Ba'al Tashchis. Re-cycle this paper and send it to Aron Kotler of Lakewood fame so that he can use it for his next Chinese Auction.
i daven with shmuel fried everyday
he will crush tendler
LMAO
UOJ now i will find out who u are tonight ill ask shmuel fried lololololol
you are toast
Y.Y.,
Don't ask him. What's the point? UOJ, and all of the other anonymous bloggers, can't do the good they're doing without anonymity.
Its Mordy Tendler who is toast.
And what does LMAO mean:
Should be ?
Roshei Teivos LMAO = Laughing my ass off.
What the Kotler boys were doing as they were planning their now torpedoed Chinese Auction Extravaganza.
But, not to worry, these 100 million dollar real-estate geveerim are now hard at work planning their next "screw-you" fundraiser.
Y.Y. better not mess with Fried. He's the Darth Vader of Toanim. You may just find yourself on the wrong side of a lawsuit for all of the married vibelech you've screwed.
JWB,Elul....
Deep Nose has verified again & again that Fried is the maestro of the Rockland County Womens Symphonic Choir & Orchestra.
Deep Nose knows.
Rodef,
Thanks.Not to worry.
The odds that Fried would say anything to anyone is nil, especially to a guy like Y.Y., who walks around in one of Tendler's straitjackets and high heels.
UOJ, I have been living here for years and years. While Fried may have his hand in the proceedings, there are plenty of other people who are fed up with Tendler and are working hard to try to dislodge him from the community. These people are not working with Fried. And, yes, the word is spelled "devastated".
Elul,
Perhaps you can shed light on one mystery for me, because I'm not from Monsey. A few months ago, the Jewish Press ran an ad supporting Tendler from the Board and Officers of his shul. I personally know some of those people. Normal, good people with college and graduate degrees. How did this happen? Were they fooled? Or did they know about it, and wanted to overlook his sins, and forgive him? But how can they forgive, when he flatly denies everything?
These people are not Jim Jones, Kool-Aid drinking cultists. I'm just baffled.
Yesterday, the Rabbinic Integrity Committee posted the English translation of a summary of their findings. THERE ARE AUDIOTAPES. And the Hebrew version is dated Iya 5765. Last April-May.
How could Rabbis Dovid and Reuven Feinstein be involved in this. And even his father, Rabbi Moshe Dovid. Mordy is sick, sick, sick, a very bad guy.
Its not Mordy who so much surprises me, its the people in his synagogue who are following him off the cliff. A Jewish Press ad! Can you imagine that! Stating their names!
Any thoughts would be highly appreciated.
Elul & Monsey Chevra,
For the life of me, I can't figure out what the hell the KNH membership is thinking.
I know a few guys left, but would not a "suspension" be in order until it's sorted out?
I'm flabergasted!!!
i wish uoj would give us more real estate advice.
Fried? Merely an experienced gun for hire who couldn’t care less about the truth, his involvement proves naught. I know nothing about this controversy but can’t help thinking that the growing propensity among many in the community to avoid responsible decision making in favor of seeking direction from a Rabbi, is the cause of sad scandals such as this one. The innocence or guilt of this one man aside, we need to reexamine the purpose and place of Rabbis in our culture. Ours is not a religion of intermediaries, but rather one that calls for direct communication between man and his god. Feel the need for counseling? See a reputable psychiatrist, the AMA insists that he accept remuneration in money, not sex or adulation.
HI UOJ,
interesting writing.
One question. Are you the guy I used to sing the Shlock Rock version of Abarbanel with?
AR
It’s all about boundaries. But how can there be any boundaries when it is considered normal to bring a pair of dirty panties to a Rabbi for his examination and permission to have sex? RABBIS, GET OUT OF OUR BEDROOMS!!!!!
i daven together with fried in shul UOJ u dont get it then ul see my post on this blog shortly
Rodef: With respect to the Jewish Press, I can only surmise that they owed Tendler a favor; they just were out to protect him. It was politics or personal and had no relationship to journalism, which is supposed to be grounded in an impartial investigation of facts. The JP was just RMT's mouthpiece, but it was hollow and fooled a few but not all. It won't last. The Jewish Voice and Opinion out of Northern New Jersey also ran some pro-Tendler articles, again as a political or personal favor to the Tendlers. It won't matter in the long run. More than a dozen women have come forward. There are audio tapes, which have been heard by comptetent rabbonim. There is DNA evidence. There are rumors and stories, raging for years now here in New Hempstead. There is a lawsuit. Many have left his shul, including every person with semicha, but a cult following remains. Part of the dynamic is that RMT did help people over the years, and people don't want to turn on him because of hakaros hatov. But it's just going to go from bad to worse; it puts the entire Orthodox community and the institution of the rabbonim in a very bad light. It's had a bad effect on many many people. I have spoken to a few of the women and heard tapes.
There is also evidence of a six-figure payoff to one woman. Some shul members are incensed that the money they donated to the shul went to pay off this woman.
UOJ,You had the best and most sad comment.Mordechai Tendler was the secretary-shamash to R.Moshe for a number of years.What A SHAME.
If Tendler acted as a counselor-rabbi then1)it is gross malpractice.
2)in some states it is criminal.
it is not a consenting relationship.
Read Steve Weiss Interview with Jason Maoz on the JP's defense of RMT on today's canonist.blog.
Very interesting.
Sorry, It's canonist.com
Perhaps we should introduce Tendler to Kolko.
UOJ is epstein from flatbush
u can delete this post now i wont repost it i just wanted to show you that shmuel fried told me who you are
YY---Your out of your league with Rabbi shmuel.If you think for a moment hes going to tell you the name of anybody.Your a fool.Hes a very very shrewd toian.And you with your brilliant "intellect" will trick him.Give me a brake. Go back to cheder where you belong.Your dealing with the big league. Start with the aleph bet,and vowels.
Thats the beauty of this blog. Everybody thinks they know who UOJ
is.Your a joke yy.Will the real
uoj please stand up?If Rabbi shmuel told you a name ,hes a bigger fool than you.Which is unlikely?You need some help.Get it.
We're adults here,not children.If your a child, play monopoly.Its more on your level.Didn't get chanukah gelt tonight.Im uoj.I admit it.Seeker from monsey or flatbush.Grow up,you baby.Have your mother change your diapers.Your smelling up the blog.
are an asshole
I agree with the anonymous bloggers that opine that there are too many rabbis sticking into our business.
It's our fault, we created this monkey with the cup.
Anon, 3:35
I agree with everything you said, save the part about Fried not caring about the truth.
He plays many roles; dayan, mediator, advisor, toain, rav....
as a toain his job is to advance his client's interests.
Interesting to note, he has turned down MANY PEOPLE THAT HE FELT WERE LYING TO HIM AND WORSE....
Fried aside; thanks for the response. I think it is incumbent upon us all to gently teach our children to think for themselves and to follow their inner sense of right and wrong. The answers do not rest with self perpetuating Rabbis.
Something like this happened in the movie
DOWN AND OUT IN BEVERLY HILLS
Anon, 9:45
We do all we can for our children, teach them, set examples....then daven.
The whole story is almost unthinkable and leaves me with questions:
Obviously Mordechai Tendler was a well-respected Rabbi. The allegations, if true, show us that he is indeed a real sicko. Were there no other signs? Did it really take several years for people to realize what he is all about?
How can anyone in their right mind fall for this moshiach-god-mentor bullshit? Is it really conceivable that he strung the alleged victim along all this time without her thinking during the whole debacle that this guy is a fraud?
Perhaps she was a willing participant in that she enjoyed all the attention and did not really believe him but wanted to nevertheless continue with the sexual relationship out of sheer enjoyment. Or maybe she is a lunatic who made advances that Tendler couldn’t resist, then for whatever reason she got pissed off at him and turned it into abuse.
The whole story is fishy and something crucial is missing from the equation.
I hope we find out soon.
"How can anyone in their right mind fall for this moshiach-god-mentor bullshit?"
Is your belief system so different?
What I meant to say was. How can a reasonably intelligent woman fall for his alleged "game?."
The same way you bought into whatever system you live by.
What's the Kler? Gross. Nothing fishy at all. This fish stinks from the head.
HA-KA-DA-CHAS.
There are untold numbers of sex molestation and child abuse cases in our community that never see the light of day because we have ...ba-ba-ba, been conditioned by our rabbinic "leaders" to keep quiet and not go to the proper authorities. It's Loshon Hara, they say, Motzei Shem Ra, they thunder, he's an Ish Chosuv, they opine, He! would do something like that??...they look at you like like you're a bit off, and if you persist, soon make you believe that you are. It's your imagination. And besides we don't go to the Akum to air these kinds of things. We'll look into it. But for a multitude of reasons, they never do.
Think of your kids shidduchim prospects if this ever got out, your standing in the community, etc.
It all gets swept under the rug.
Project Extreme, MASK, At Risk, et.al.
How many of these children are the victims of sex predators and other forms of child abuse? Do you know?
I betcha the Yeshiva Hanhalas know but don't report it. Why? For the afore-mentioned reasons and also because if word got out it would be bad for business. Loss of customers and tuition. So they become ecumenical, turn the Christian Cheek, and the abuse continues.
Our NYS licensed PT's, OT's, and ST's are Court Mandated Reporters who know first-hand of abuse cases but are severely pressured not to report them so that these Yeshiva's and organizations can protect their Daled Amos. These very same principals that give Divrei Torah on Principles and Approaches to Chinuch are the under-the-rug sweepers.
How sick is all of this?!
For the sake of our community and our children's future, I hope RMT does not turn sane and settle out of court. Airing this out, as painful as it will be, may hopefully herald the beginning
of a new and correct approach to handling these sordid situations.
Funny, I saw a sign posted in a Boro Park Shul that stated something like this:
Just because it's in the newspaper it doesn't mean you can still discuss it. If the oilem knows, it is still Lashon Hara.
What they should be saying instead is, Don't let your Yetzer Hora take over, and cheat or molest (or both) or you'll you end up in the newspaper and cause a big Chilul Hashem and have everyone talking about you and! Don't cause people to speak Lashon Hara.
Gross,
Anon is trying to get your goat by saying since you believe in the crap you believe in(Orthodox Judaism), Tendler's victims can easily be swayed into his "god" Judaism.
Please know that there are some very gullible people out there, both men & women (& certainly kids).
They are so desperate to fit in somewhere and starving for attention that they lose perspective, especially when that someone has charisma and is a man of the cloth.
I spoke to a woman who was from Seattle. The rabbi was Moshe Londinski at the time.
This woman had a doctorate in chemistry, and an author of many well recognized books in her field of expertise.
Yet, the s.o.b Londinski convinced her the only way she was able to become a full fledged baalas tshuva, was first to have "him" supervise her as she went to the mikve, then have real weird sex with him for seven consecutive days.
SHE BOUGHT IT.
The same goes for all the F**** sick bastards, they prey on the vulnerable and desperate.
Think about all the charismatic rabbis that fooled you in one way or the other,( unrelated to the physical) they live on to practice their craft on the next vulnerable person(s).
"Anon is trying to get your goat"
Not so. Sorry for the indelicate approach. Just making the point you expounded upon so clearly.
UOJ,
I realized where "Anon" was going after his 11:21 comment, so I chose to ignore it.
I understand what you are saying, especially when you use the comparison of "charismatic rabbis that fooled you in one way or the other,( unrelated to the physical..."
I guess the levels of gullibility continue to shock me.
"Not so. Sorry for the indelicate approach. Just making the point you expounded upon so clearly."
OK. Understood.
Sorry if I offended you. Not my intent.
Gross,
We all have been lied to and fooled.
I'm venting to protect the unsuspecting and innocent.
We found an anonymous mentsch.
Apologies accepted for brother Gross.
Here's a partial answer to the question of how these women "fell" for RMT's advances: Most, if not all of them, were emotionally disturbed or otherwise very vulnerable people, not particularly strong in their knowledge of Judaism. Some of the women are outright mentally ill, and look it. If you would see some of them you would say, "He chose to have sex with HER?"
elul;
Like taking candy from a baby, huh! Easy.
Prey on the vulnerable.
RMT would have hit it off big-time with Bernie Bergman.
UOJ
What about that filthy child molester Arab ger Shlomo Helbrans?
He encourages wife swaping and he ruined Sholom Bayis.A bunch of primitive Yoiley's backed him,and some Hungarian putz ball habatim made him parlor meeting.What someone will do for a little recognition
Anon, 11:35
I don't know Helbrans.
Post the info or e-mail me details so I can check it out.
Thanks
Uoj
What is your E-mail adress?
Anon 11:35
Helbrans is the guy who was convicted in Brooklyn of kidnapping a secular Israeli boy. His divorced mother hired him for Bar-Mitzvah lessons. It was also over the newspapers a few years ago. The boy was spirited away to Rockland County somewhere, grew peyos, put on the Chassidic garb, etc. After a few years, though, he gave it up, went back to his family, and Helbrans was arrested and convicted by Hynes's office. The boy's first name was Shai, I think, and I can't remember his last name.
A fair number of Chassidic rebbes did support Helbrans. Even a few "Litvish", including one Rosh Yeshiva who I actually admire a little bit, to the extent that I'm not going to say his name.
A Google search, or a search in the NY Daily News, which ran a lot of articles, would bring up a lot of information.
I never read, though, that Helbrans was an Arab ger. I heard he was a baal teshuvah, but not ger.
I once saw him on the TV news a couple times, and he immediately struck me as a phony. Perhaps because I'm a BT, I'm better at this than some people, because I'm often right.
I also certainly never heard of the wife swapping part. And I do question it. Another man's wife is an eishes ish, and she's forbidden min haTorah. That's a little hard for even a Helbrans to get around. Mordy Tendler, no, but Helbrans is coming from a different direction, kidnapping a kid to make him frum.
What is Yoiley?
yoily = satmar
courtesy of Boog, your neighborhood blogopedia.
The boy's first name was Shai, I think, and I can't remember his last name.
Fhima
Yoily, that's perfect.
Yes, Fhima.
"Yoili" is a nickname for "joel".
Yes, we know. Rav Yoel Teitelbaum, the Satmar Rebbe.
Rodef,
Thanks, I knew the story, did not know the name.
Anon,
My e-mail is posted on the Hella Winston piece.
Thanks
Gross'It is difficult to understand because you are thinking rationally.But many of these women follow a classic profile of dependence ,low self-esteem and overvalued need for attachment.It then becomes a slow slippery slope.
Elul 53,
The pecker has a mind of it's own.
Look at Clinton,he was the most powerful man on Earth, was the fat Jewish kid the best he could do?
Power, position, low self-esteem,
recklessness and invincibilty, all combined in one scumbag, you get a Mordy.
y.y., are you in real estate?
See Newhempsteadnews.blogspot.com for creative reporting from one insider
Read it. So RMT has called a meeting for tomorrow at the KNH shul.
Let's see if any of the members have the gumption to ask the hard questions to his face.
This guy is so delusional, there's no question he's going down.
As Michael Ray Richardson said so eloquently about his lousy Knicks team many years ago:
"The ship be sinking".
UO;
"The pecker has a mind of it's own."
In Mamalushon, it's:
"Ven der Putz shtaight, ligt der Kop in Drerd".
A little off topic - Regarding people in power abusing woman ,children and the like: At the age of 11 on Yom kippur afternoon I was physically assaulted by a respected member of a " out of town" community -Im not getting into the details but it wasnt pretty- etc. there were actually 2 aydim and drawing of blood no hasroah but definately bordering a chayev misah offense ( yom kippur,drawing blood) to make a long story short I was an 11 yr old wild kid- even my parents werent 100% backing me up- It was that farfetched of a story and this a well respected guy- no waves etc- On the way to his house the next day I took an icepick-my father pulled up to see this, calmed me down etc and that was it I made up my mind that when Im 17-18 big and strong etc like the " older boys" then i was gonna kill him!- Fast track to 17 I still remembered and i was still pissed. I spoke to the rav who knew of this guy and apparently i was noty the only one etc.In his own words " In Europe the askanim would take these kinds of people out of the shul on R'H or Y'K when all the talleisim were over peoples head -take them to the river and DROWN them!!"At this pt I was not too religious and involved with a little shadiness and my comment to the rav was well - screw dina dimalchusa- Im gonna take him to a dark alley etc! his response- " If we were in Europe I would go with you to that dark alley" BUT were not etc etc...Take him to B'D instead- and sue him monetarily for emotional damages this way win or lose - the word gets out! Ok- Before I decided to take it public I had a talk w/ his son - a sweet lo yutzlach who begged me due to shidduchim Please not to go public telling me-" My father is an ANIMAL" - You dont even know the begining of how me and my brothers suffered - never my mother for if so i would have killed him myself!!! With this in mind I decided on a simpler course of action with the sons blessing! 5:30 in the morning on the way to give his daf yomi shiur said rabbi was confronted -alone on a deserted street with jackboots and a .44..................
Anon,8:15
I hope you are not relating a true story.
Law enforcement has a way of monitoring these type of comments.
Please, if you need some advice or help, you may e-mail me, I'll be happy to lead you to a competent professional.
All The Best,
UOJ
I did not kill the man.He tried to run and there was a confrontation-I still remember him asking me not to use nivul peh- that was the least of his problem -I directed him to a close by wooded area - got him on his knees- I asked him if he knew vidui baal peh.. He started to beg for his life< to interject- a cpl years before this my father did actually confront him asking him to ask me for mechila-he refused and told my father the following-" If a malach wasnt watching over me that afternoon -I wouldve killed your son!" my father refused to speak with him ever again! Why he didnt do more is another issue altogether>I realized that what happened to me was not gonna change-causing him pain or not,my primary concern at that time was to prevent him from doing things like that again.To that end I calmly explained to him that I would be watching him -If it happened again there will be no questions -and if he so much should lay a hand on anybody again there would be no malach there to save him.No Beis din .No more lies. Din.Dayan.Executioner all rolled into one- He understood very clearly this was not a joke -This was about 6-7 years ago .To my knowledge he has "reformed" He has not (and i keep tabs) bothered anyone since.I see him occasionaly in shul when I go back home- Ill ask him if hes behaving himself.He just quietly nods.Would I actually carry throgh if he would...??? I hope that that is a bridge I dont ever have to cross. The rabbi who was originally consulted in my case as well as many others that he had known about told me directly-" He has a din of a Rodeph" by doing these things hes killing kids neshomas..etc.There is however a dina dimalchusa issue which is why he recommended beis din. In Closing There are many ways to go in situations like these.I personally knew kids who violently confronted rabbis who had molested them etc. and ended up in jail.Clearly that is not a viable option. In my scenario while probably not being the most mature response -I was 17 - It seems to have worked .It seems a threat of imminent death can do wonders for self control. UOJ and others - How should the COUNTLESS kids who have been abused in one form or another over the years- many still wandering the streets of flatbush,BP, Willy etc. confront the pain?? These are not yechidim- There are A LOT of these kids out there!!
Anon, 10;04
I am really glad that you did not get yourself in trouble by harming him.
I feel for you; yes, I know there are so many people that have had horrible experiences.
I'm sure there are competent people that are skilled in these areas and can be of help.
If anyone you know is seeking professional advice, I would assist in that effort. You must know that getting in trouble with the law is NOT the answer.
Please let me know if I can be of any assistance to you or anyone you know in a similar situation.
I know many people throughout the U.S. that have the capacity to help people who are in need of guidance.
Be Strong; you have a wonderful life ahead of you if you work at it.I care.
Hatzlocho
Counseling is the only option. Youth-at-risk "Rabbis" should be avoided like the plague. They only reinforce the negative "chinuch" and never get to the root of the problem. It's not all about "love" (w/ an agenda, I might add) but sometimes it takes confronting the perpetrators of abuse.
this is anon 10:04 - 1st to anon. 11:22- counseling would help BUT there are unfortunately counselers who do more hurt than help.A major problem is that it was the rabbis or rebbes that these kids ( not me- I was playing in the shul bsmnt) turned to originally for help that ended up betraying them.How can anyone help? Its a real problem when the sight of a beard makes them nausous. a religious figure makes them sweat and walking into shul brings back awful memories- TG I have survived and prospered.I believe in tora misinai.I have understood that unfortunately one cannot judge judaism by the behavior of jews.i run a legitimate business. i also employ many kids who are or were once " at-risk" "off the derech" try to teach them responsibility and accountibility and TRY to be an authority figure that they can respect or look up to without bringing religon into the arena.Just plain old human dignity,respect and responsibility .TRY to lead by example that you can succeed w/out the shtick so prevalent in " jewish" industries .On another note -just to reemphasize the power of such abuse ( mine was very minor by comparison)There was a time in my life when i was heavily involved in the drug scene (together with a lot of other -ex-frum kids) I have moved on with my brain still intact TG and have tried to learn from my experiance- Not long ago I received a call at about 2am from an aquaintence who unfortunately still dabbles in the vices of life- He begged me to come help him- This was a kid about who i always wondered why he gave up yiddishkeit- He came from an excellent family ,his parents were loving caring people.All his siblings stayed on the straight and narrow .He was one of 4-5 children somewhere in the middle. A sweet kid,He never did quite fit in to the hardcore drug scene.He was in pain that much you could see-why,I never knew till that night.I picked him up from one of the worst areas of the city -crack dens + street whores and there is " yitzi" the only white face for blocks. He was tripping on some acid ,high on crack and god knows what else -i took him to my home ,laid him down on the coach -got some hot milk- here was yitzi -a few years after i had seen him last -track marks covered his arms,legs wherever he could find veins.No more graphics but it was a horrible sight.Yitzi whose father was a mechanech teaching yiddishe neshamos , whose mother said tehillim night after night for hashem to save hert son. Yitzi whose brother just had his 4th child , whose sister just got married kdaas moshe v'yisroel- Yitzi is shooting dope with the cooshim in abandoned houses ,his business deals are with strung out street hookers.this was a GOOD kid. He cried all night .He was messed up real bad. When he started getting more lucid his words started to become clearer- he was telling me about when he started learning with a rebbi after school in the 7th grade -his father wanted to get him a head start in meforshim , his sweet father ( and i know him and he truly is ,maybe too naive but a true erliche yid)wanted to give an edge to be a mitzooyan! This rebbi manipulated him and eventuall y RAPED him repeatedly.NOT groped.NOT fondled.RAPED him forcibly for a YEAR!!. He threatened that if he ever told or stopped coming he would KILL his mother .CAN YOU IMAGINE!! This bastard had conditioned poor Yitzi so well that this was the 1st he'd ever told anyone and in his own words even though he knew now that this shit wouldnt kill his mother- the fear instilled in him by this monster had hold of him! He cried for 4 hours .He was shaking .I have seen many things on the roads Ive traveled but this was one of the worst- A grown(22-23) man shaking ,crying almost shreiking in horror, and yes the drugs had a lot to do with it but the words he was telling me were no illusion.It was real.There is always gray in these matters - some kids will exxagerate to excuse themselves or assign blame etc . On the other hand this is a real problem in all societies and unfortunately in our ("Ohr Lagoyim"-sic) society as well.This could almost not be considered child abuse but rather Retzichah.Plain and simple .Retzichah. Would the various rabbis and rabbinical societies cover up for so long up until the point where they must disclose ,if the issue was murder? If there was ample evidence of a "frum" rebbe murdering a talmid?Would they get a slap on the wrist so that they can go and do it again?These people should be uniformly denounced ( albeit once there is sure evidence)and banned from all communities of frum yidden even if no criminal charges can stick or if the statute of limitations have run out.If rabbonim know about these problems and do nothing to limit these peoples involvement with children or woman or whomever their problem is associated with -It seems clear that they will have to answer in heaven for their silence. It seems clear to me that this can be and sometimes is a matter of RETZICHAH!! . There is no clear answer for this problem .I would welcome your comments UOJ and others and if you'd like too help - take a drive down coney island ave or OP after 1 am - There are many of your victims- talk,shmooze -youd have more names in a half an hour than youd know what to do with .I m not familiar with the current indoor haunts of brkln kids or the clubs in the city but safe to say you shouldnt have any trouble finding them.Just tell them your looking to put some bad people to justice - youll have lists unfortunately. The only suggestion I can humbly put forward is some kind of "council for rabbinic integrity" ala tendler or 800 # for confidential information specifacally related to abusive people in power.Of course one cant believe everything you hear but certain names will repeat themselves. Where theres smoke theirs fire!!
sorry for the punctuation, any spelling errors and sentence structure - I think the content speaks for itself.These are not stories. Names have been changed but these are real kids. " Yitzi" is a REAL kid .This happened about 3 MONTHS ago! and again this is an extreme case but you'd be surprised how many kids like this are around!The pain gets internalized and they turn to the obvious answer- drugs to numb the pain away- these kids dont get into business, professions etc- ( for the most part) they go down that slippery slope of pain ,confusion, anger ,hopelessness and victimhood- May Klal Yisroel have the balls to tackle this problem! Hakodosh Boroch Hu Lo Yanoom v'Lo Yishon -SHOMER YISROEL! any suggestions would be welcome and thank you for the vent!
To: Anon. 12:36/12:44 a.m.
I'm a lawyer, and I've been active in trying to do something about the problem of sex abuse in our community. In person, on the telephone, and by numerous letters and e-mails with all of the major frum organizations, I've been trying to accomplish two things:
1. Criminal background checks of all employees and volunteers working in yeshivas/day schools;
2. Torah U'mesorah having an internal registry of people who are unfit to work in our mosdos, because of a history of violence or sex abuse.
In May 2003, Torah U'Mesorah had a seminar on the problem of sex abuse, and some of the speakers said that the concept of a registry has been endorsed, but nothing has yet been done.
I got a boost in May 2005, when the RCA at its Convention passed a Resolution that I proposed and drafted, which endorses my two proposals. You can read it on their website, rabbis.org.
At this point, I've written letters to the Governor, and leaders of the Assembly and State Senate, asking for a new statute (law) that would require criminal background checks in all nonpublic schools, i.e., yeshivas, day schools. As I state in my letter, 42 out of 50 states require their public schools to perform background checks; 10 states require their nonpublic schools to do background checks; without compulsion of law, many nonpublic schools and volunteer youth groups are doing background checks, e.g., all Catholic schools, Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts, Little League of America, etc. Only we Jews aren't doing this.
Public support for my proposal would help, and if you, or someone you know, or any other serious person reading this blog would like to invite me to speak somewhere, I am available. Depending upon the venue, I feel I have to charge a somewhat modest fee, because thus far, I've spent too much of my own money on this project, and I've spent more hours than I care to think about on this project.
Finally, I hope to form an association of yeshiva/day school parents and friends that will push this proposal, and also explore other, new ways to make our schools a better and safe place for our children. Again, all interested persons can contact me at my e-mail address below. I do have some specific ideas in my mind. I particularly need somebody with computer skills to set up a website, which will include some of my letters on this issue; and I also need lawyers who can set up a nonprofit corporation, eligible for tax deductions.
Kol tuv.
Elliot B. Pasik, Esq.
efpasik@aol.com
Civil court is the best thing that ever happened to RMT. Why idin't anyone else take him to court? because they're so frum about "arka'os"? If you lie at an RCA hearing and they find out, what happens? Nothing! If you lie in court, you go to jail. Let all these same witnesses come and testify under oath in civil court. If they do, at LEAST three of them are going to jail for perjury. (This is personal first hand knowledge concerning their previous false testimony) I am not a chosid of RMT, but I know the facts in at least three of the cases. You heard it here first.
ChaimYankel,
When was the last time that you know of in a "civil case" that somebody went to jail for perjury?
The entire country would be in jail.
You gotta be kidding.
BTW, Adina Marmelstein is telling the truth.
I know.
Here's Adina Marmelstein's attorney posing with former President Bill Clinton. Ask Lenore if she's willing to take on Monica's case.
http://www.kramerdunleavy.com/InTheMedia.html
Perjury is false testimony under oath. If you testify falsely in a civil proceeding you have committed perjury.
Word on the street has it that the RCA refused to accept her testimony because she's a little bit of a nut case.
I am not hear to judge if Rabbi Tendler is innocent or guilty But what I know 1st hand is that Shmuel Fried is clueless. He is horrible at what he does, he doesn't prepare himself or his client for sessions at bais din. He may good for getting a get,and should stay away from business transactions.
I also had dealing with fried, and I can verify your claim.the man is a walking talking golam
As a side note I feel it necessary to mention that I find it very funny that the 1000 member strong Rabbinical Council of America, with their beit din ha kavod, and rabbinical committee, and halachic committe, etc, admit defacto that they are all so unknowing, inept, and incapable to proceed by themselves to a simple Beis Din, that they have to get a chassidishe yiddela as a Toen, because they can't do it themselves.
i have heard personally from A.M. and from other women about the manipulation used by RMT. a relationship of trust has been violated. One other woman told me about 3 other women she knew that had been seduced by RMT. This particular woman has been discredited and labeled as crazy by some males in the community. these women may be vulnerable but they are telling the truth. it is a shame that there is even a question whether a woman can be a reliable witness. Tho the frum community has many spiritual and loving people who embody the virtue of Judaism, they are no different from any other community in that there are people who use their status in religious community in order to exploit others. The problem is that there are few avenues to redress these grievances and far too much covering up of male exploitation of women. This Tendler thing has been going on for YEARS, perhaps even decades-people have enabled him all the way through. women all know about it. it's about time it was out in the open.
I personaly was coerced into having a 3 year sexual relationshop with rabbi tendler i hope fried frys his ass and i hope tendler takes it up the ass in jail
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